Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Sunday, January 22, 2012


So I don't think I have cried that much since May, or June, or July for that matter:) Amos and I opened up some tender and pretty raw wounds late last night. I knew they were still there, I think they always will be to an extent...

We have heard amazing things about the new movie Courageous, but honestly knew very few details as to what it was about. It is probably a good thing, because I am not sure I would have been brave enough to watch it, but it was SOOOOOO worth it. The tears were worth it. What a powerful message. If you haven't seen it, run and I mean run to rent or buy it!

I think it impacted us so much because we have had so many similar conversations in our family over the last year. If there is anything we have learned it is to slow down, live intentionally, and that life is so very, very fragile. While we did not lose an older child, the pain and grief are still all too familiar. I have played the movie reels in my head of the missed moments rocking, holding, playing and watching Isaac grow up. And the one thing that has kept both Amos and I steady the whole time is our faith and hope we have in knowing we will one day see Isaac. Until then as I like to say to Anastacia, he is sitting in the lap of Jesus.

My hope and prayer for all of you is that you won't ever have to lose a loved one or have tragedy strike to cause you to reflect on your life and motivate change. Just this week I answered a text back late at night from a girlfriend who responded she was surprised I was still up. I quickly explained I had already been to bed once and was on my second trip for the night. I had laid down to snuggle with Anastacia and say our nightly prayers. As usual I ended up falling asleep and moving to our bed about 11:) She answered back I was "a good momma", to which I replied that wasn't me, but Him changing and working on me. It made me think back to all of the moments that I have missed in the past but since losing Isaac have literally clung to with Anastacia and Amos. It isn't always easy and sometimes takes reminding that I have to be intentional about spending time with my family. It has become our number one priority the last several months. TV's and computers have been turned off while texts and phone calls often go unanswered. The house is sometimes (okay lots of times:) messy, and laundry doesn't always get done.

But as they said so perfectly in the movie what is more important than the soul of my child?

I think I should tape that to the mirror, TV, computer and my phone. Just to remind me in the midst of all of the distractions what my true focus needs to be on. We need to, we have to have an URGENCY like nothing else to pour our love and the love of Christ into our children.

STOP to dance, play, listen, connect and spend time with your children...

"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth." 3 John 1:4

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Christmas Day 2011

~Christmas morning at our house~

We keep it pretty simple at our house, because as you will see we are beyond blessed with lots and lots of family:)

The blessings poured in, I will write more about this later, but our hearts were truly overwhelmed!

Christmas at Grandma and Papa's house with our Sariah, Sydney, Uncle Russ, Aunt Kim and Great Grandma.

Loving on our Great Grandma:)

A surprise, the refrigerator to her pink kitchen set. I think she could cook all day!

Christmas at Nana and Papa's with Cristian, Erik, Tio Tavo, Tia Tricia, Aunt Julie, Uncle Ric and his girlfriend Spoorthi.

Loving on our Nana:)

Good thing he is so stinkin cute, because he is ONERY:)

American Girl doll loot, and she was blessed with lots of it! That is what happens when you have fours sets of aunts/uncles!

Aunt Julie with lots and lots of patience to unpackage all of it, and play, for hours and hours. I was told a couple of weeks later she "needed" Aunt Julie to come play because I didn't know how to do it right:)

Only at Nana's do you get lots of ice cream with syrup and m&m's...

Such a wonderful weekend, we were blessed with lots and lots of family time and worshiped with our friends/church family to celebrate the birth of our savior!

Friday, January 6, 2012

Christmas Memories

Some of our favorite memories from the last few weeks...

~Before our Christmas program at school~

~Hot cocoa, pj's, and an outing to see Christmas lights. We had so much fun we went again and she brought a girlfriend. A funny and sweet conversation took place. After a period of quiet and looking at lights her friend quite dramatically said "and our house has nothing", to which Anastacia said "that's okay, not everybody celebrates Christmas", I started to say something and glanced to the backseat. She went on to explain "well it's not about Christmas lights, trees and Santa, it is about Jesus and giving so it doesn't matter if you have lights or not." I breathed a sigh, maybe, just maybe she is "getting it"~

~Decorating our "sparkly" Christmas tree, bet you can't guess we like pink, and sparkle~

~Fun with Nana's blinking reindeer nose~

~That our cousin preferred to wear as an eye patch~

~Finally one more tooth out, we lost four from Halloween to Christmas~

~Baking with mommy~

~We loved kneading~

~I tell her she has the face of an angel~

~A visit to see Santa, she wanted to tell him she needed her two front teeth for Christmas. And then proceeded one of the most precious conversations. Santa has never been, and never will be our primary focus at Christmas. We pray for wisdom and balance while also allowing some freedom for fun:) ~

~Explaining that she "needed" her two front teeth back. Asking what she had done with them, she explained she had put them under her pillow and received some money for them. To which he exclaimed "YOU sold your teeth??"~

~Which elicited lots of giggles and smiles~

~A fun picture from the photo booth and memories. I love how her sweet hands are folded. She told Daddy, he might be the real Santa because you could see his hair, but the rest are "fakes"~