Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Our Garden

Over the last few months time spent with books, television, other past times gave way to time with scripture and in prayer. Many days those prayers were like shooting arrows straight to heaven, I spent the day shooting them only to feel like they boomeranged right back to me. Looking back it is so clear that God was answering so many of our prayers. Prayers for guidance, strength, wisdom with doctors, intervening with appointments, and friends to walk along with us. But at the same time it felt as if God was standing in an answer of silence to our big prayer. That Isaac would be healed. Then this week I had my aha moment~

"All prayers end in one of two places: the Red Sea where God does an incredible thing and changes the external; or Gethsemane, where He changes the internal." ~Walter Moore

God said to Moses: "Why cry out to me? Speak to the Israelites. Order them to get moving. Hold your staff high and stretch out your hand over the sea: Split the sea! The Israelites will walk through the sea on dry ground." Exodus 14: 15-16

He withdrew about a stone's throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, "Father if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground. Luke 22: 41-44

When we hit our knees in prayer we don't know if our prayers are landing in the Red Sea or Gethsemane. Our family went from asking, begging, crying for Isaac to be healed, for our prayers to land in the Red Sea, to whispering our surrender "Thy will be done" and asking for Him to carry us through the Garden. We always stood in belief that God could heal Isaac. At the same time we stepped out in courage to pray for His will to be done. And even though Isaac is not with us now, that does not change that belief.
Through all of this we have learned that courage isn't a choice that we make. Courage is an act of obedience and trust. Just as Jesus obeyed and trusted his Father when he was praying in Gethsemane we pray for courage to do the same. Our prayer landed in Gethsemane and not only is God carrying us through the Garden, He was and still is changing us. I have asked myself if I would change the last few months if I could. And realized that isn't a question I can ask myself. He has confidence in His plans for our family, just as He does for yours. When you pray you don't know if God will take your prayers to the Red Sea or Gethsemane. But He will always carry you and He has faith in His ability to reveal His glory through you.

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